The Season of Giving

I had an experience tonight that has me reflecting on what it really means to give. Walking out of a restaurant with some take out, a man stopped me. He had a story. There was a time in my ministry when I heard at least 20 such stories a week. Now, since my church is in the middle of some fields, I don't hear too many stories.

There are people in this world who have made scamming others into an art form. They are truly gifted. I've often wondered why these people don't channel all that creative energy and seek more honest income. For some, this scheming life might be rather lucrative. I remember reading a news article about a panhandler in a major metropolitan area who made over $50,000 a year (and that was several years ago, so he probably makes even more now). In reality, I think that is a rarity. Even the people that lie to you have a geunine need, sometimes truly financial, sometimes deeper than meets the eye, often both. I heard someone say that, as Christians, it is our job to "discern what the true need is" when people ask us for something. What are they really asking for?

I am not sure if the man I met tonight was lying to me or not. It is frustrating to me that I am automatically cynical and defensive when someone approaches me for help...as if I am expecting to be cheated. Certainly there are people who are honest and upfront about what they need. If you close yourself off to everyone, you may turn your back on someone who really needs help.

It is interesting to me that Jesus doesn't make distinctions when it comes to giving. He doesn't say, "Only give to someone if you are sure they are not lying to you and if they can produce proof of genuine need" or "Never give cash to someone because they will just buy booze with it" or "Just send them to a social service agency, that's what they are there for, anyway". Jesus is pretty radical when it comes to ideas about giving...actually, when it comes to pretty much everything.

Jesus doesn't talk about being nice. He talks about treating people differently than our instincts tell us: doing what seems unnatural, loving when we don't feel like it, giving when we would rather withold, taking people at face value, etc. Jesus says a little bit about that kind of stuff here:

"But I tell you who hear me: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you. If someone strikes you on one cheek, turn to him the other also. If someone takes your cloak, do not stop him from taking your tunic. Give to everyone who asks you, and if anyone takes what belongs to you, do not demand it back. Do to others as you would have them do to you.
~Luke 6:27-31

I have read many commentaries about this passage and others like it. I've heard sermons about it, too. Most of the time, people want to water down what Jesus says. "He didn't mean it literally", they say. I think that is the easy way out. Maybe Jesus meant what He said, just the way He said it.

Whenever someone asks me for something, I hear His words echoing through my mind: "Give to everyone who asks you". I heard that tonight, when the man, with his wife and child standing in the cold, needed $18 more for a part for their broken car. I listened to the details of his story and asked some questions. He seemed genuine. Finally, I decided that I would give him the money. Now, I could have gone to the store and actually paid the money to the clerk, which would have been wisest. But it was cold and I was running late, and I figured I would step out on a limb and trust the man. He very well may have lied to me. If he lied, well, I guess that is between him and the Lord, the One to whom we all must give account some day.

As for me, when I stand before Jesus, I don't think He will be disappointed if I was too gullible and someone took advantage of me. I do think, however, that He would be upset if I had turned away one of His children in need.

I know that we all have to be discerning--to be good stewards of all that God has entrusted to us. That means we have to make responsible choices with our resources. In life, however, there are many times when you cannot be certain which choice is right. At such times, I would rather err on the side of grace, compassion, and love...and if I get scammed every once in a while, well, I guess that is ok.

Christmas Fun

This is just a fun Christmas-time activity. Because I am verbose beyond description, I cannot simply answer the questions with one or two words. Sorry!!!

I'd love to hear your responses to the questions. Copy and paste this into the comments section and add your own answers. Or, email me (you can look in the "About me" section on the left-hand side of the webpage, and click on "view my complete profile"; there is is link to my email on my profile page).

1. Wrapping paper or gift bags: I'd have to say gift bags, though I feel guilty about that, since this holiday season, Americans will produce 44 million tons of waste, a 25 percent increase over the rest of the year. I've heard of people using the comic pages of the newspaper as wrapping. I like that idea!

2. Real or Artificial tree? Artificial...because you can put it up any time, keep it up as long as you want, and not worry about starting your house on fire.

3. When do you put up the tree? The day after Thanksgiving.

4. When do you take the tree down? Not until Epiphany on Jan. 6th...since that is when Christmas officially ends.

5. Do you like Eggnog? It tastes like toes.

6. Favorite Gift you received as a child? Books...the consistently great joy of my life.

7. Do you have a nativity scene? several...but the wise men are still on their way and not part of the "scene" yet.

8. Hardest person to buy for? my dad...he has everything...

9. Easiest person to buy for? my nieces, because there are so many cute things for girls

10. Worst Christmas gift ever received? Cash, from a boyfriend in college...seriously...it was a nice amount of cash ($75), but he gave it because he couldn't think of anything to get me. That was the beginning of the end.

11. Christmas Cards: Snail mail or E-mail? I like Christmas cards and all, but whenever I get them, I feel guilty for not sending them...and I really don't have time to send them. So, they are a bitter-sweet experience!

12. Favorite Christmas Movie/Show? I love them all, especially the sappy, Christmas romance movies on Lifetime and Halmark. "Charlie Brown Christmas" is my eternal Christmas favorite!

13. When do you start shopping for Christmas? A little bit here and there from about October on...still somehow, no matter how much I plan, I end up at a store the week of Christmas to get a last minute gift...which I HATE...especially Easton, for anyone who lives in Columbus. You have to drive around the parking lots there for half an hour before you can even find a place to park...not an efficient use of my time and it makes me want to murder people! Things that lead to homicidal tendencies are not good, generally speaking.

14. Have you ever 'recycled' a Christmas present? Not really...but then again, I have a bunch of things (former gifts) that I never use, stored in my basement. I should probably start re-gifting.

15. Favorite thing to eat at Christmas? sugar cookies...with icing and sprinkles...shaped like Christmas things. LOVE THEM!

16. Clear lights or colored on the tree? I like both...but this year have colored lights on my tree. It feels more festive...but not as polished looking.

17. Favorite Christmas Song? "We Three Kings" (the words to the verses are fabulous!!!)

18. Travel at Christmas or Stay Home? As long as I am with the people I love, either is fine.

19. Can you name Santa's Reindeer? yes, only because I learned "Rudolph, The Red Nosed Reindeer" as a young child.

20. Do you have an Angel or a Star on top of your tree? An angel...which seems more holy to me than a star...it isn't more holy, that is just my perception. Besides, the angel on the top of my tree most likely looks NOTHING like the angels of the Bible, which were probably very scary-looking beings.

21. Open the Presents Christmas Eve or Morning? We always opened Christmas presents on Christmas even with my mom's side of the family and on Christmas day with my dad's. Now, being a pastor, Christmas Eve is a pretty crazy day, so the last thing I am thinking about is opening presents.

22. Most annoying thing about this time of the year? Traffic, crowded malls, hearing modern versions of "The 12 Days of Christmas" played every ten minutes on every radio station in the universe.

23. Shopping: Online...the parking at the malls seriously makes me crazy!

24. Do you decorate outside for Christmas or just inside(or at all?) Does a wreath on the door count as decorating outside?

25. Favorite Christmas cookie? Never met a Christmas cookie that I didn't like...but, the buckeye (a chocolate, peanut butter confection shaped like, well, a buckeye) ranks up there...guess that isn't really a "cookie"...

26. Do you own Christmassy clothing or jewelry? I bought my first "Christmas" sweater this year and wore it to every church-related Christmas event that we had. I half expected someone to ask me to start teaching 3rd grade when they saw that sweater, but I have yet to receive that job offer...

27. Do you believe in Santa? I believe there was a St. Nicholas. I believe that there are santas at the mall. But one person, living at the north pole, delivering presents to all the good children of the world...not so much.

28. Favorite Christmas tradition? Attending a late night, Christmas Eve candlelight service. I love singing "Silent Night" while everyone holds candles.

29. Favorite Christmas memory? There are many, but I loved spending time with my grandparents (who are all passed away) at Christmas. I remember my Grandma Ehrnschwender's (that's really her name) steak and potato pancake Christmas Eve dinners. I also remember waiting for my Grandpa Dietsch on Christmas morning. He always had to shave and do his morning routine on Christmas morning, while we waited to open presents. I swear it took him 45 minutes to shave. It was almost unbearable!

30. Embarrassing, Chaotic, or unexpected Christmas moment? When I was a senior in high school, I was the "head angel" on Christmas Eve. At the late night Christmas Eve candlelight service, the high school girls would dress as angels and pantomime the lyrics to "Silent Night" in front of the altar. It sounds cheesy, but it was really very beautiful...and something that the younger girls dreamed of being old enough to take part in. All the angels faced the altar, with their backs to the congregation. The "head angel" was in the very front, right at the alter, with everyone watching and following her lead. At one point of the song, we had to get down on our knees. When I,as head angel, went to stand back up, I stepped on the hem of my long white robe, tripped, and fell head first into, and onto, the altar. I pushed myself off the altar, got back into place, and finished the song...horrified and embarrassed. The choir, who had a front row perspective of my "fall", were the first to make comment after the service (but not the last). This began a series of jokes that continued for years, referring to me the "fallen angel". At first, I cringed when people said it. It became funny after a while (like, maybe, by the next Christmas!!!)

It's not your birthday...

A friend of mine (who is a youth pastor) is challenging her youth to have a "slim Christmas". She encouraged them to ask their parents for LESS presents this year, with the idea that the parents would then give that money which would have been spent on presents to a mission project for the Sudan (which I will discuss in more detail below). Can you imagine American teenagers saying, "I don't want more stuff. I have enough ipods and cell phones. Christmas isn't about me. It's about Jesus. And I want Jesus to be known in this world. What I want for Christmas is to make a difference for Jesus Christ." The amazing thing is, the kids are on fire over this, wanting to bring about the Kingdom of God here on earth.

Their youth group is also selling t-shirts, with all the proceeds going to the Sudan project. On the front, the shirts say: "It's not about me". On the back: "Living simply so that others might simply live". I've had this mental picture all day of a typical American Christmas list placed next to the list of a Sudanese child. I grew up as an American child. I know what it is like to make a Christmas list: stuff, stuff, stuff, and more stuff. Imagine the African child's list: food, clean water, shelter, safety. That really put things in perspective for me.

My youth pastor friend got this idea from a church in Tipp City, Oh called Ginghamsburg United Methodist Church. The pastor, Mike Slaughter, first challenged his congregation about 5 years ago (I believe) with the idea that Christmas is Jesus' birthday, not yours. His idea was that we can celebrate our own birthdays, but for Christ's birthday, maybe we should celebrate in ways that are more fitting His mission and purpose. Slaughter proposed that people in his congregation spend half as much on Christmas as they normally would and give the other half to mission. The specific mission that their church has embraced is in the Sudan (Darfur), which the U.N. has identified as the worst humanitarian crisis in the world today.

From the Ginghamsburg website: "In Darfur, Sudan, 300,000 people have died over the past three years as a result of civil unrest, lack of food and disease. Two million children, women and men are refugees, with little food, drinkable water, protection or hope."
Check out more at their site: http://ginghamsburg.org/sudan/

It is a challenging message and witness for all of us. What does it really mean to be a follower of Jesus? What effect does/should our commitment to Christ have on how we live and how we give? And what does it really mean to celebrate Christmas? What kind of Christmas celebration is most pleasing to God?

Three answers from Scripture come to mind:
1) "Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world." James 1:27

2) "He has showed you, O man, what is good. And what does the LORD require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God." Micah 6:8

3) "When the Son of Man comes in his glory, and all the angels with him, he will sit on his throne in heavenly glory. All the nations will be gathered before him, and he will separate the people one from another as a shepherd separates the sheep from the goats. He will put the sheep on his right and the goats on his left. "Then the King will say to those on his right, 'Come, you who are blessed by my Father; take your inheritance, the kingdom prepared for you since the creation of the world. For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me.' "Then the righteous will answer him, 'Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you?' "The King will reply, 'I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me.' " Matthew 25:31-40

Let us remember Christ and the meaning of His birth, and let us live every part of our lives in a way that brings Him the most glory.

This is a video from Ginghamsburg Church. It is a 2006 update on the Sudan project. Very inspiring!

Manger Throne

At Bible study tonight, we talked about our hearts as a throne for God. That conversation brought this song to mind, though I have never heard this particular version before. It is by a group called Third Day, which I personally LOVE...but the lead singer, Mac Powell, has unique voice. It may not be everyone's taste, but the words are beautiful. Check it out!

MANGER THRONE
What kind of King would leave His throne
In Heaven to make this earth His home?
While men seek fame and great renown
In loneliness our King comes down

Jesus, Jesus, precious One
How we thank You that You've come
Jesus, Jesus, precious One
A manger throne for God’s own Son

You left the sound of angels' praise
To come for men with unkind ways
And by this Baby's helplessness
The power of nations is laid to rest

What kind of King would come so small
From glory to a humble stall?
That dirty manger is my heart, too
I'll make it a royal throne for You

My heart is a throne
My heart is a throne for God's own Son

Being an innkeeper

For Advent this year, a group of people from my church have been reading a book called "Christmas From the Backside" by J. Ellsworth Kalas. Kalas was my preaching professor in seminary...an extraordinarily gifted preacher and man of deep faith and passionate commitment to Christ.

We used to laugh in seminary, as he would critique our sermons. He would chose a part of your sermon and say something like, "I like what you did there, but you could also do something like this..." And off he would go, preaching a new sermon--a phoenix rising from the ashes of your old sermon. His impromptu sermons were some of the most beautiful I've ever heard, leaving us breathless and often in tears. It is rare that I have been in the presence of such greatness, but once you've experienced it, you never forget.

Kalas has a collection of books whose titles include the phrase "from the backside": parables from the backside, new testament stories from the backside, old testament stories from the backside, on and on, etc. He likes to take familiar stories and look at them from a new perspective (i.e. "the backside"). One thing I remember most from his class was a concept he often repeated. The idea was that we, as preachers, need to find something unique to say in each sermon. Not something no one in the history of the world had ever thought of before, it just had to be new to us...an "aha moment". That's probably not a bad principle for any public speaker...or really anyone who speaks, ever: Before you talk, make sure you have something to say! In a world of too many words, we were inspired to actually speak with meaning, hope, excitement...speaking as if God is really alive and active and doing someting in the world and in our lives. I try to do that in sermons, to feel like I have something--at least one thing--that needs to be said because of its depth and originality. Some Sundays are better than others, but that is the nature of life, I think!

In reading this book during Advent, there are several things Kalas has brought to light for me, making me think about the Christmas Story in a new way. In one chapter, he discusses the innkeeper (the one who had no room for Mary and Joseph in his establishment that first Christmas Eve). I really liked what Kalas had to say and appreciate what is has meant to me this season, as my heart prepares more room for Christ.

From Christmas From the Backside by J. Ellsworth Kalas (Abingdon Press: Nashville, 2003, pp. 42-43)
"I understand the innkeeper. I've learned that so many of us shut God out of our lives, not necessarily because we're hostile to him, but simply because we are 'filled up' with other things. Indeed, that's the tragedy of most of our lives, especially since so much of what fills our lives is trivia. So often persons who have passed through a crucial illness say that at the edge of death, they got a new understanding of what is worth living for. Everything seems to conspire to fill our days with life's transients--and then, when Eternity knocks at the door, seeking a place, we have to report that our rooms are full. You and I are often like the innkeeper: We shut Christ out, not because we hate Him, but because we are preoccupied. In fact, I ponder a quite uneasy thought. The innkeeper never knew, I'm quite sure, that he had just shut out the very Christ; he was simply filled up. And this is just the way some of us go through life--not knowing that Christ has sought admission. We get so occupied with other matters that we don't even recognize the divine inquiry.
And so Christmas comes even to those who aren't seeking it, who don't even particularly want it. It comes to hotels that are filled, to lives that are crowded, to people who are preoccupied. And always, it comes saying, 'I love you. May I come in?'...(several paragraphs omitted) and then, of course, the question comes, just as it did twenty centuries ago: Will we make room for Him?"

Elf Yourself

Since posting earlier today, I have learned there are more things one can do besides Scrooge-ing themselves. Apparently, we can also "elf" ourselves.

In the spirit of love, laughter, and celebration, I offer the following link of my own elfing. Hopefully, I will never run for president and come to regret this moment.

Check it out for yourself: Tina's elfing

Dancing Scrooge

I am not really a Scroogey kind of person, but my dad sent me a Scrooge-related link that brightened my day...and I thought I would share...but first, some background...

Apparently, Office Max has developed a way for people to "Scrooge" themselves. Under the "Scrooge Yourself" description, it says: "The holdiays are here and there's entirely too much cheer floating around. Do your part and add a touch of frost to the air this season. Upload a picture of your face, then send your crotchety curmudgeon to a friend". Then you click on a link that says, "Let the Humbug Begin".

Before you think, "How awful to promote grumpiness at Christmas!", you need to click on this link and watch my dad all scrooged-up and dancing around. At the end of the dance, you can make yourself, or someone you love, into a scrooge. I promise it will bring much more cheer than humgug!!!

p.s. Bucher, if you scrooge yourself, send me the link...because that would ROCK!!!

"We Are The Reason" by Avalon

I thought I'd share another video of a song that I love. It's been a while since I've heard this and I'd almost forgotten about it. There are a couple pictures in this video that seem odd, or at least oddly placed, but maybe it's just me. There are also some of the most remarkable pictures I've seen in a long time in here. I especially love the very last one. I have never seen that picture in reality, only in drawings. Check it out to see what I am talking about!

There is one line from this song that really sticks out to me:

"I've finally found the reason for living. It's in giving every part of my heart to Him."

Nothing sums it up better than that!

I pray that today finds you giving even more of your heart to Him!!!

The Tale of Three Trees

We had a Christmas party for our church women's group tonight. I was in charge of the "program". The program is meant to be short, sweet, and meaningful...and Christmasy in nature.

So, we took a Christmas quiz, read the Christmas story, sang some Christmas carols, and then I shared a story that has become meaningful to me. I'm not sure why this particular story impacts me so deeply. As I read through the story again this afternoon, in preparation for tonight, I was suddenly teary-eyed. I guess it makes me ponder the precious and lasting parts of life. That is an important reminder, because I am easily distracted by lesser things. I remember a line from St. Augustine's Confessions, where he discusses his life before loving Jesus. He says of his pre-Jesus life (and probably true during certain seasons of his life after Jesus): "I fell in love with beauty of a lower order". We miss Truth and Perfection because we are often focused on lesser things...still beautiful things, but not the most beautiful. We each have hopes and dreams about good and enduring things, but nothing compares with the beauty of Christ Himself. Nothing compares with the beauty of the dreams God has for us.

The story I read tonight speaks about expectations and dreams...the hopes we have for who we will become and what life will be like. Sometimes, many times, things don't work out the way we originally pictured. In those moments, it would be easy to think that God does not care about our wants and dreams. The truth is that God has bigger and better dreams in store for us than anything we can imagine.

Christmas is a wonderful picture of how God works in ways that defy imagination. I would expect God to come to earth with chariots and trumpets, making a lot of noise and fuss, with some profound scene of regal importance. Yet, when God wants to show us what divinity is all about, He comes to earth as a baby...weak, helpless, needy, messy. God's plan is so different than what I imagined. Somehow, in the end, God's idea is better.

Here is God's idea:

Colossians 1:19-20 "For God was pleased to have all his fullness dwell in him (Jesus), and through him to reconcile to himself all things, whether things on earth or things in heaven, by making peace through his blood, shed on the cross."

I need to be reminded, over and over and over again, that God really knows what He is doing. I like to tell God how things should be, both in my life and in the world. Forgetting that, maybe, just maybe, God has had a plan all along...and that plan far exceeds the wildest hopes of this inconsistent dreamer.

The legend of these three trees...and, more importantly, the true and amazing story of God's entrance into our world...reminds me that God is up to something, always. We can trust our dreams into His hands, because God is the best dreamer of all.

The Tale of Three Trees--an anonymous folk tale

Once upon a mountain top, three little trees stood and dreamed of what they wanted to become when they grew up. The first little tree looked up at the stars and said: "I want to hold treasure. I want to be covered with gold and filled with precious stones. I'll be the most beautiful treasure chest in the world!"

The second little tree looked out at the small stream trickling by on its way to the ocean. "I want to be traveling mighty waters and carrying powerful kings. I'll be the strongest ship in the world!"

The third little tree looked down into the valley below where busy men and women worked in a busy town. "I don't want to leave the mountain top at all. I want to grow so tall that when people stop to look at me, they'll raise their eyes to heaven and think of God. I will be the tallest tree in the world.

"Years passed and the little trees grew tall. One day three woodcutters climbed the mountain. The first woodcutter looked at the first tree and said, "This tree is beautiful. It is perfect for me." With a swoop of his shining ax, the first tree fell. "Now I shall be made into a beautiful chest, I shall hold wonderful treasure!" the first tree said.

The second woodcutter looked at the second tree and said, "This tree is strong. It is perfect for me." With a swoop of his shining ax, the second tree fell. "Now I shall sail mighty waters!" thought the second tree. "I shall be a strong ship for mighty kings!"

The third tree felt her heart sink when the last woodcutter looked her way. She stood straight and tall and pointed bravely to heaven. But the woodcutter never even looked up. "Any kind of tree will do for me." He muttered. With a swoop of his shining ax the third tree fell.

The first tree rejoiced when the woodcutter brought her to a carpenter's shop. But the carpenter fashioned the tree into a feed box for animals. The once beautiful tree was not covered with gold, nor with treasure. She was coated with sawdust and filled with hay for hungry farm animals.

The second tree smiled when the woodcutter took her to a shipyard, but no mighty ship was made that day. Instead, the once strong tree was hammered and sawed into a simple fishing boat. She was too small and too weak to sail to an ocean, or even a river. Instead she was taken to a little lake.

The third tree was confused when the woodcutter cut her into strong beams and left her in a lumberyard. "What happened?" The once tall tree wondered. "All I ever wanted was to stay on the mountain top and point to God...

"Many, many days and nights passed. The three trees nearly forgot their dreams. But one night, golden starlight poured over the first tree as a young woman placed her newborn baby in the feed box. "I wish I could make a cradle for him," her husband whispered. The mother squeezed his hand and smiled as the starlight shone on the smooth and the sturdy wood. "This manger is beautiful," she said. And suddenly the first tree knew he was holding the greatest Treasure in the world.

One evening a tired traveler and his friends crowded into the old fishing boat. The traveler fell asleep as the second tree quietly sailed out into the lake. Soon a thundering and thrashing storm arose. The little tree shuddered. She knew she did not have the strength to carry so many passengers safely through the wind and the rain. The tired man awakened. He stood up, stretched out his hand and said, "Peace." The storm stopped as quickly as it had begun. And suddenly the second tree knew he was carrying the King of heaven and earth.

One Friday morning, the third tree was startled when her beams were yanked from the forgotten woodpile. She flinched as she was carried through an angry jeering crowd. She shuddered when soldiers nailed a man's hands to her. She felt ugly and harsh and cruel. But on Sunday morning, when the sun rose and the earth trembled with joy beneath her, the third tree knew that God's love had changed everything. It had made the third tree strong. And every time people thought of the third tree, they would think of God. That was better than being the tallest tree in the world.

Immanuel (meaning "God with Us")

This is one of my favorite Christmas songs. It is beautiful and true :-)

The lyrics:
A sign shall be given
A virgin will conceive
A human baby bearing
Undiminished deity
The glory of the nations
A light for all to see
That hope for all who will embrace
His warm reality

Immanuel
Our God is with us
And if God is with us
Who could stand against us
Our God is with us
Immanuel

For all those who live in the shadow of death
A glorious light has dawned
For all those who stumble in the darkness
Behold your light has come

Immanuel
Our God is with us
And if God is with us
Who could stand against us
Our God is with us
Immanuel

So what will be your answer?
Will you hear the call?
Of Him who did not spare His son
But gave him for us all
On earth there is no power
There is no depth or height
That could ever separate us
From the love of God in Christ

Immanuel
Our God is with us
And if God is with us
Who could stand against us
Our God is with us
Immanuel

Winter Wonderland

Walking my dogs tonight, I was awed by the beauty of snow. It is the first time snow has fallen with any constancy this season. My dogs like to jump up and catch it on their tongues. So do I, if truth be told.

I love this time of year, when snow is still new and exciting. By February, snow becomes burdensome, gray, and depressing. But now, at the beginning of its winter reign, the snow is a gift. Something about snow makes life seem magical, as if anything can happen, at any time; the world is filled with expectation. While it is falling, everything seems bright, crisp, new, clean.

There is a section of trees not far from my front door. They are huge evergreens, all clumped together, with an antique light post directly in the middle. Tonight, surrounded by evergreens, standing in front of the misplaced light post while snow fell with unrelenting gentleness, I felt like I was transported into a Narnian land.

In C.S. Lewis's "Chronicles of Narnia" series, a light post is accidentally transplanted in the ground as Narnia is created. The light post becomes a landmark during the consecutive books, an oddity that stands out in the midst of the wintery forest. Narnia instantly captured my imagination as a young reader (it still does, as an older reader). Narnia is an enchanted land of surprises and wonders. It is a land of talking animals, most notably, Aslan...the Lion. Aslan is meant to be a Christ-figure.

Whenever I think about Narnia and about Aslan, there is one scene from the books that always comes to mind. It is a discussion about Aslan's nature--what He is really like.

(From: "The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe")

"Is - is he a man?" asked Lucy.

"Aslan a man!" said Mr. Beaver sternly.
"Certainly not. I tell you he is the King of the wood and the son of the great Emperor-Beyond-the-Sea. Don't you know who is the King of Beasts? Aslan is a lion - the Lion, the great Lion."

"Ooh!" said Susan, "I'd thought he was a man. Is he - quite safe? I shall feel rather nervous about meeting a lion."

"That you will, dearie, and no mistake," said Mrs. Beaver, "if there's anyone who can appear before Aslan without their knees knocking, they're either braver than most or else just silly."

"Then he isn't safe?" said Lucy.

"Safe?" said Mr. Beaver. "Don't you hear what Mrs. Beaver tells you? Who said anything about safe? 'Course he isn't safe. But he's good. He's the King, I tell you."
-----

I love that line: "'Course he isn't safe. But he's good". What a perfect description of Jesus. Jesus is the Judge, the King, the Ruler, the One who "calls the shots"...but lest we become frightened that He is some despotic ruler, we remember that He is good.

That is a great reminder for this season of the year. Christmas is not just about a baby. It is about a baby who is King. He is so big and powerful that our minds can't contain Him, but He is so good that He takes on our weakness to show us His love.

I will close with lyrics to a song...a song about a King who became a baby...a King who is not safe, but is always good.

"Welcome to our World" by Chris Rice:

Tears are falling,
hearts are breaking
How we need to hear from God
You've been promised, we've been waiting
Welcome Holy Child
Welcome Holy Child

Hope that you don't mind our manger
How I wish we would have known
But long-awaited Holy Stranger
Make Yourself at home
Please make Yourself at home

Bring Your peace into our violence
Bid our hungry souls be filled
Word now breaking Heaven's silence
Welcome to our world
Welcome to our world

Fragile fingers sent to heal us
Tender brow prepared for thorns
Tiny heart whose blood will save us
Unto us is born
Unto us is born

So wrap our injured flesh around You
Breathe our air and walk our sod
Rob our sin and make us holy
Perfect Son of God
Perfect Son of God
Welcome to our world

Atrophy

Atrophy: any weakening or degeneration (especially through lack of use)

If something is really true (the "deep down in your bones" kind of truth) it applies to all aspects of life. I have come to believe in the process of atrophy as a universal truth. Unused muscles--of any type--will weaken, degenerate, cease to function. What is true of the body is true of the blog. Lack of attention to any area of life leads to a decrease in function. Ignore the blog, and the blog will cease to thrive.

As you may have noticed, I've been on hiatus. At first, it was intentional, to give me time for mission trips and other summer ministry demands. However, weeks have now turned to months (evidenced most clearly by the steadily falling snow outside). I've learned that if you take too much time away from anything, it is difficult to gain momentum again. The whole process of blogging and not blogging has made me wonder about the myriad responsibilites of life. With so many things demanding our time, how do you know which to put first?

I have long loved the quote: "The 'good' is the enemy of the 'best'". There are a million good things competing for our attention. Which are the BEST things, the most important things, the things worthy of our ultimate focus?

With blogging, for example, I contemplated giving up on the process. After all, I had gotten out of the habit and was sure that all two people that read my blog would move on to more profound reading materials in my absence. Amazingly, I have discovered that, perhaps, more than 2 people actually read my blog.

It is one thing when your mom tells you she misses what you have to say. This is the same woman who hung very sub-par craft projects on the refrigerator and considered them divinely inspired "art". Recently, though, I have actually heard from people I do not know--strangers wondering if I died or something. While it is flattering to know there are people that actually care what I have to say, it is not my main impetus for blogging again. Really, I just plain miss it. I miss writing. I miss the thinking about thinking that it takes to write.

The whole process has made me think about priorities. Maybe a way to choose priorites is asking the question: Is this something that I really want to live without?

At least for now, this is something I no longer want to live without. I can't speak for the future, when other important things that I want in my life may call me to reconsider previous commitments. But for now, I am back.

Customer Service Woes

I am getting ready to leave on our youth mission trip to Kingston, TN this weekend. There are a lot of last minute details I am trying take care of before leaving. Tonight, I was checking my bank account online, making sure that bills had been paid and checking to see if a deposit had registered. To be honest, I have addiction issues with checking my bank account online. I check it probably twice a day, sometimes three times…just because I can.

Tonight, I noticed a charge from amazon.com for $5.95 that came out of my checking account. The thing is, I haven’t bought anything from amazon.com in a few weeks—but admittedly, I am a frequent amazon shopper. I went and checked my amazon.com account to see what that charge was from, and there was nothing in my account information that explained the charge. My computerized bank statement actually had a contact number that went with the charge, so I decided to call. Apparently, I am so desperate for $6 that I am willing to spend my Friday night on the phone with a customer service representative. Really, though, I was just worried that other unauthorized charges might start popping up on my checking account and I wanted to make sure that didn’t happen.

So, I call. The person who answers the phone is from India…seriously. She can barely pronounce the questions that her script tells her to ask. I am pretty good at understanding people with accents, but not tonight. I kept saying, “Could you say that again?” I felt like such a jerk! She seemed like a nice lady and was trying really hard, but the whole interaction was frustrating. It took 3 minutes just to clarify the spelling of my last name (granted, my last name is not that user friendly, but still…). Then she put me on hold for 12 minutes to “research the situation further”…yes, I sat on the phone, holding for an obscene amount of time, just for my $6. When you make 20 cents an hour, $6 is a big deal! Seriously, though, my real question was: why am I being charged for things that I did not purchase or authorize?

After being on hold forever, she came back and asked for more information…like my blood type, my favorite movie, and my deepest fears and desires…actually, the questions were somewhat more closely related to the topic at hand, but it felt like the conversation was headed in a completely unrelated direction. Seriously, how much information do you need to find out why I am paying $6 for nothing?

At the end of all this, she tells me that I will get an email in the next 1-2 business days from someone who has researched this further. I ask: “So, this email will tell me why that money was taken out of my account and assure me that it won’t happen again?” She simply repeats: “You will get an email in the next 1-2 business days from someone who has researched this further”. Then she added, “ok?” I think she said “ok” about 567.2 times during our 24 minute (and 20 second) conversation. That’s right. I was on the phone close to a half an hour over $6. I promise it was the principle of the thing that kept me going. And yet, after all that time, I know nothing more than I did before. Such is the state of customer service in the year 2007.

Christian Beauty Tips

I was surfing the Reynoldsburg Emmaus website tonight and read their latest newsletter. In that newletter was the following article, which I thought was cute...so here it is...

REAL BEAUTY - submitted by Kimberley Scott
We live in a beauty-obsessed culture, where we long for perfection--doing whatever we must do, buying whatever we must buy and spending whatever must be spent--to find perfection in this less-than-beautiful, imperfect world.

As important as physical beauty is, so much more so to God is our inward heart beauty. To be truly chic and glamorous, consider the following Christian "Beauty Tips":
1) For attractive lips, speak words of kindness.
2) For beautiful eyes, look for the good in others.
3) To improve your ears, listen to the Word of God.
4) Rather than focusing on the thorns of life, stop to smell the roses and count your blessings, giving thanks for each one of them.
5) To strengthen your arms, hug someone and touch them with your love.
6) To strengthen your heart, forgive yourself and others.
7) Wondering what to wear? For the ultimate in business, casual or evening attire, put on the robe of Christ--it fits like a glove, but allows plenty of room for growth. Best of all, it never goes out of style and is appropriate for any occasion!

Dogs, treats, and the grace of God...

As I type this, I am sitting in an oversized chair with two dogs curled up on the top of the chair. It is like having a giant, fury headrest. I mention this because I am going to talk about my dogs…again.

We went out for a walk this morning: Ariel, Pepper, and I. Our usual routine is to go for a walk, come back in and take off the leashes, and then get a “treat”. The dogs usually stalk me until they get their treat. They act as if they’ve been stranded on a desert island without any food for days. This morning, as I went into the kitchen to get the treats, only Pepper followed me. I called to Ariel and she didn’t come, which was odd, especially since food was involved. I walked into the living room and found her sitting on the couch (the WHITE couch, mind you), looking as cute as ever. I threw the treat toward her and it landed on the floor, a couple feet in front of the couch. Ariel just sat on the couch, looking at the treat. I thought it was odd, but figured that she was just being independent. So, I ran upstairs to collect laundry and once I finished with that, Ariel was still on the couch. I realized something must be wrong, because normally she and Pepper both follow me around like I am a world-famous movie star and they are the paparazzi (it makes me think I am way more important than I actually am!).

I went over to Ariel on the couch and started touching her to see if she had any sore spots. I lifted her little bottom up from her sitting position and realized the problem. DISCLAIMER: something disgusting is about to be said!!! Turns out, it was a poop issue…a little stuck and dangling (did I mention that I have a white couch?!). So, being a good dog-mom, I went to get some toilet paper and we did a little “procedure” to free Ariel from her discomfort. She instantly ran to get her treat and commenced with stalking me all over the house.

I felt pretty bad that I made her sit there for about ten minutes before even checking to see if she was ok. She did a number of strange things, all of which should have alerted me that something wasn’t right. It made me think about God and how He takes care of us in a very different way than we take care of things. He knows instantly what the problem is; He knows even before we do. He doesn’t leave us to sit in our own poop, proverbially speaking. God rushes to our aid, to do for us what we are unable to do for ourselves. That means a lot to me and is a great reassurance, especially during the poopy seasons of life.

It also makes me think of a song, of which I only know a few lines (and am not even sure who wrote it). But I offer it to you today as a message of comfort and hope:

He didn't bring us this far just to leave us.

He didn't teach us to swim to let us drown.
He didn't build His home in us just to move away.
He didn't pick us up to let us down.

Nerdishness

It has been a while, blogophiles. I apologize. Things will be hit and miss this summer, but I will be a little more regular and definitely back in full swing by the fall. For today, I offer you the results of my "nerd test"...not that I needed a test to prove the implicit nerdiness of my being, but it isn't quite as bad as I suspected.

Being Knit

I came across an article entitled, "I was born in the wrong body" on an internet news site last week. I didn't read the article, but I think it was about people who are born, biologically, as one gender but feel, psychologically, that they are the other gender. My first response to that title was: "Well, who doesn't think that to some degree?" I mean, I have thought for a long time that I was, in fact, born in the wrong body. The body I was meant to have looked a lot more like Angelina Jolie's body than mine. I've thought about a lawsuit, trying to get my body back, but am doubtful that I would win.

I'm not trying to diminish the deep, internal pain that people with gender issues face. I'm just thinking that we all, to some degree, feel out of place in our bodies. Eating disorders are rampant in our culture. The cosmetics industry is a multi-billion dollar industry. Plastic surgery, hair implants, weight loss products and paraphernalia are all hallmarks of our intense dissatisfaction with our physical bodies.

The Bible refers to our mortal bodies as "tents"...giving the impression that this flesh is temporary, at least in the grand scheme of things. There is also mention of us having "resurrection bodies", which is an idea that brings me a particular joy. That doesn't mean our earthly bodies are of no value or that we shouldn't care for them as if they were a gift from God (which, in fact, they are). It's just good to keep in mind the temporary nature of this world. Meaning, even though I don't look like Angelina Jolie now (because, as I mentioned earlier, she stole my body in a top-secret sting operation), someday I will...

I wonder if our dissatisfaction with who we are as people is upsetting to God. He made us all extraordinary, different and beautiful in our own ways. Yet, we spend our lives trying to change who we are, deeply dissatisfied with God's creative genius in our unique situations and bodies.

God’s unique creative process has become a lot clearer to me as I've been learning how to knit in the past few months. Some of the ladies from church formed a group called the "Knit Wits", for knitters in all stages of expertise. I thought I'd give it a try and gracefully bow out if I knitted like a chicken (not sure how chickens knit, but probably better than me). I'm not the world's greatest knitter, but I am starting to get it. There are only two different stitches in knitting: the knit and the purl. Sounds pretty easy. It's not. That's what they told me to get me to start: "Oh Tina, there are only two stitches. You'll pick it up in no time at all". Well, there's a lot more to knitting than that, but I won't bore you. I am amazed at the myriad creations which are possible from the combination of some yarn, two needles, and two basic stitches (note to my family: prepare yourselves for a lifetime of knitted Christmas and birthday gifts!).

My knitting is still very flawed. I make mistakes and then have to backtrack just to figure out what I did...sometimes taking out several rows worth of work in the process. But a master knitter, she can look at what you did and tell you in an instant where it went wrong. Using the same two stitches, a master knitter can create works of beauty that I can't even imagine creating...even if I practiced for years.

And all this, of course, makes me think about God...who could be called the Master knitter of all master knitters. Psalm 139:13 says of God's creating us: "For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb."

This makes me think a lot of things, but primarily that God intentionally and uniquely created each one of us. We are distinct, purposed creations. We are each meant to be here, as we are, looking how we do, being who we are, residing in the bodies in which we currently reside...God planned it all from the beginning. You don't accidentally knit something. It is intentional. It takes purpose and planning. We are not here by accident, or mistake. We are here because God chose to knit us into existence. I picture these big cosmic hands knitting me into being...and that makes me smile.

Another thing about knitting: it is very intimate. Both of your hands are involved. You have to hold the yarn and the needles close to your arms, your chest, your eyes. The more complex the pattern, the more detailed attention you have to give to your creation. What is more complex than a human being? I picture this knitting God focusing His whole attention on our creation, delighting in each completed "row" until the creation grows to its fullness. Then He must sit back proudly and say, "I made that. That's good stuff."

I felt pride at my first creation: a blue wash cloth that my mother received as a Mother's Day present. She appropriately gushed over my creation, the way only a mother could. I was amazed that I actually made something. It was so hard just to figure out what I was doing—taking hours and hours of practice before I could even begin to make something. But there I was, an imperfect creator making an imperfect creation--and still somehow, thinking it was wonderful. Imagine God, the Perfect Creator, making us...incapable of making anything but a perfect creation.

So, if you ever feel like you were born in the wrong body--or dislike the particular way you were created--remember that you were knit together by God Himself...and He thinks what you are is good…amazing, even. Who are we to debate God’s opinion of us?

Ten Things I Think, Part Deux

Here are the rest of 10 things I think:

6) Boring Sermons
Even the best preacher has a "bad" Sunday once in a while. Maybe 'bad' isn't the best word choice. It's just that every sermon cannot be exceptional--that would defeat the purpose of exceptional, really. Sunday was such a Sunday for me. Sometimes you know it is going to be a weak sermon going into it: you don't really connect well with the Biblical text, you feel uninspired, you had a difficult week, you can't find the "so what?" factor (which is the part of the sermon that answers the question, "so what does this mean for me and my life?", which is the ultimate question people are asking), etc. There are a lot of reasons why every sermon is not a stellar sermon. Most times, you know it going in...but sometimes, like Sunday, you figure it out mid-sermon.

Any person who is a regular public speaker learns how to "read" an audience. You can tell when people are "with you", when their eyes are totally fixed on yours and it seems that everyone is waiting expectantly for the next word to come out of your mouth. You can also tell when people are doodling, thinking about their shopping lists, or staring at their watches. On those days, you sometimes want to stop, right in the middle, and say: "Would you like me to just stop now and we can all get to Bob Evan's a little bit sooner?"

I felt that "bad sermon" vibe this Sunday. Half the people were with me, but half the people looked fidgety and ready to go...almost before I started. There was one bright spot in the midst of the sermon, our sweet keyboardist, Marla. Every time I looked over at her, she smiled at me, nodded and looked like she was paying attention. On a bad sermon day, you need someone like that to cheer you on...and remind you that maybe someone is actually getting something out of the sermon.

The funny thing is, as I stood at the door after service (to shake hands and kiss babies) one man said to me: "Do you have a telescope straight into my soul?" I said, "Why yes, I do". And we laughed, but apparently, something in the sermon--which felt endless to me--spoke to him. The lesson I learned from this: maybe I am not the most objective critic of my own sermons!

Along those lines, I was in the church library this week with our librarian, Jane, and her husband, Tom. They were going through some books that were donated from another area church. Amidst the boxes of books was a book entitled, "Things to do during a dull sermon". We all laughed and laughed about that, and Tom put it in our stewardship chair's mailbox, since he seems like the kind of guy who would really get a kick out of that. I have a feeling that I will be seeing that book again and again. There must be a lot of dull sermons in order for a book like that to be written...and we have all, unfortunately, experienced them or else it wouldn't be so funny.

7) The Simpsons
I admit it, I am a Simpsons fan. I love the satire of it all. The show is intelligent and sarcastic and multi-faceted, plus most of the episodes are really funny. I realize it is a cartoon and that it is, at times, controversial. Multitudes of others must share my Simpsons affinity, because the show now has 400 episodes to its credit and is going on its 19th season in 2007-2008. One of the great woes of my life concerns the Simpsons movie which is coming out this summer, at the end of July, when I will be in Russia on a mission trip. I am hoping that Moscow might have a special Simpsons premier at the Kremlin or something (pretty positive that isn't an option).

The Simpsons were a big deal when I was in seminary. Every Sunday night was Simpsons night at our house. One time, for the Simpsons season premier, we had a huge party and were going to rent a big screen TV (but it was too expensive for our jobless budgets)...so we hooked up several TVs and turned them all to the same channel, while multitudes crowded into our small living room. It was like watching TV at Best Buy, but it is a beautiful and unfading memory. We even had a Simpsons-marathon sleepover one time, since one of my friends had taped virtually every episode of the Simpsons (this was before every season of every show was instantly released as a set on DVD). Most Seminary conversations contained some Simpsons quote or reference. It was like the Simpsons also attended Asbury Theological Seminary. So now, when I watch the Simpsons, it reminds of community, shared memories, and the closest relationships of my life. It is amazing how a group of little yellow cartoons reminds me of God's greatest blessings to me, but it does...and I love it!

8) Listening
People tell me all the time that I am a really good listener, which makes me laugh. I am very aware of the times I interrupt someone, simply because I want to say something. I am aware of the times my mind starts to wander when someone says things that aren't interesting or exciting. I am aware of times when I don't ask follow-up questions about something that someone obviously wants to talk about. I am not a "great listener".

In reality, I am an average listener. The sad truth: most people are such bad listeners that my average listening skills appear exceptional. People don't listen well. They don't ask questions, they interrupt, they talk about themselves more than anything else, they don't watch for nonverbal cues that communicate more deeply than words, and they don't remember details of things people have shared. I will ask people, all the time, about things they tell me...and they say, "I'm so impressed that you remembered that". It is not hard to remember what people say if you are really paying attention. Most people are not really paying attention. So, when someone does remember things, it stands out. Most people would label themselves as good listeners, but it is kind of like driving. Pretty much everyone things they are a good driver, and yet look at all the accidents. We are not really honest with ourselves.

I have had so many encounters with people where they talk 90 percent of the time. I am not talking about professional counseling sessions, where it is my pastoral role to listen and ask questions. I am talking about normal interactions at meals and outings. One time, I was at a meal with someone who talked about themselves for an hour straight, literally. I really didn't mind, because I like learning about people and enjoy asking questions. The thing that struck me as odd was, after an hour, the person said to me, "All I have done is talk. Now I want to hear about you." And I said, "Well, what do you want to know?"...and within a minute, we were back to talking about her, for another hour. I wasn't bothered by the fact that she talked and I listened. I was bothered that she noticed what was going and then just continued to talk about herself--like it didn't really matter. Most people are unintentionally self-centered...but to intentionally be that way is not as acceptable to me.

Overall, I like listening to people. Listening is a way to show people that they matter and that you care about them. It is a simple way to put love into action. I find people fascinating. I like to hear stories. I like to understand where people are from and how they think. I like to ask questions. It saddens me that the majority of people don't seem to share my affinity for listening to others.

The times that non-listening bothers me most, really, is when I am in a group of people and someone is sharing something significant, and another person jumps in with some tangent that really has nothing to do with what is going on and is generally just about them. We are all so rude to one another. We talk a lot more than we listen. We interrupt, constantly. We talk over each other. We think our opinion is the most important opinion--and must be shared before someone else has the chance to speak. My latest prayer is: "God, when I talk too much, shut me up; teach me how to listen; give me a heart that really cares; make it my greatest desire to show You to others, instead of getting my own way, making my own point, or saying something really profound; Jesus, just get me out of the way until all people see is You".

9) Extreme Makeover: Home Edition
I like to watch "Extreme Makeover: Home Edition". It is nice to see a show that isn't sleazy. I have a little problem with the underlying premise that material things make up for horrible tragedy and pain. Yet, some of the conditions that people live in are just shocking. I'm not sure that flat screen tvs and computers in every room are necessary all the time...but safe, clean, pretty homes and financial help and college tuition...those things are good things. Most of all, people really need Jesus and the community of the church, but that wouldn't be a ratings hit for tv. To me, there should be no need for this show...the Church should step up and be the church. Every community that Extreme Makeover: Home Edition has gone to must have tons of churches within a mile of those homes. I remember hearing in seminary that there were only two counties in the entire USA that did not have at least one United Methodist Church. And that is just the United Methodists. Where are these churches and what are they doing? People are living in squalor and can't feed their families and what are we doing about it?

This past Sunday, the family receiving a home makeover was a single mom who, as a social worker, ended up adopting several kids with AIDS. She talked about the prejudice and hate that her family had experienced. In one scene, at a camp for children with AIDS, one girl (from another family) stood up and talked about getting kicked out of church on Easter Sunday by...get this...THE PASTOR. The pastor asked her and her family to leave, on Easter Sunday, because she had AIDS. This makes me livid! First, no one should EVER, EVER, EVER be asked to leave on a Sunday morning...even if they have leprosy. Jesus pretty much showed us how to treat all people, even people that are scary or may be contagious (which AIDS certainly isn't...not from sitting in the same room...and even if it were, Jesus didn't care about that kind of stuff and neither should His followers).

I have heard of ushers at churches telling people they weren't dressed correctly for church (seriously, not making it up) and have heard other ridiculous things said by people who go to church but obviously don't get Jesus AT ALL...but a PASTOR...a PASTOR...a pastor should know better...a pastor will be judged more harshly for something like that (check the Bible), probably because he/she is supposed to teach/show people what God is like...what a bad example. The girl and her mother still cried as she talked about not being able to go to church on Easter. I am sure that Jesus cried too. If I could find out who that pastor was, they would be hearing from me.

10) Dogs
A day would not be complete without a story about my dogs. I give my dogs these treats called "bully sticks". The lady that I got Pepper from introduced me to them. The dogs love them, they last a long time, and they never choke on them. They are a bit expensive, but if you buy them in bulk (from ebay, nonetheless!) you can get a pretty good deal. When I researched what a bully stick really is, it turns out they are sometimes tendons from bulls, but mostly bull penises (that's right, I said "penis" on my blog).

The whole thing disgusts me to no end, but the dogs are crazy about them. So, I try to make minimal contact with these things...and usually, both the dogs grab them out of my hand faster than the speed of light...and then run away from me like I am going to take the treat back or something. Every once in a while, Pepper kind of looks at the bully stick I am trying to hand her, like she is figuring out if I am giving her something good or bad. You can tell she wants it but she is a little apprehensive. Since I refuse to hold onto those gross, smelly things any longer than I have to, I just drop hers on the floor. The minute the bully stick hits the floor, she snatches it up and runs away, usually to bury it. Sometimes, Pepper forgets where she buried her treat and stares at Ariel eating her treat and then comes to me, whining and looking pitiful, until I go searching for her treat and find it for her. I love Pepper, but she is not the sharpest tool in the shed, if you know what I mean.

Anyway, this whole treat process makes me think about God and the good gifts He tries to give us. I have never once given Pepper a bad treat or something that would hurt her. Everything I give her is either a toy or a treat or some people food. Most times, she freely and eagerly takes what I give. But every once in a while, she looks perplexed, like I am trying to trick her. This frustrates me endlessly because I have never done anything but love and pamper her. And I wonder how many good and wonderful gifts God offers to me--is even offering to me right now--and I refuse because I am scared or because I doubt His goodness. How many times do I hide and hoard the gifts I have been given, "burying" them, scared that it may be the last gift, scared that God will forget about me from now on.

I know how much I love my dogs (it is pitiful, really) and I know that I would never hurt them, intentionally. I occasionally step on one of them because they insist on being within an inch of me at all times...and I feel horrible when it happens. But I am imperfect. God is perfect. He never steps on us, unintentionally or intentionally. He chooses to bless us and form us and lead us and change us...and sometimes refine us...but always with His best for us in mind. I wonder why we are so distrusting at times. Why do we expect God to be anything but overwhelmingly good to us?

10 things I think, Part One

I have a friend named Bryan Bucher, who has a blog (http://www.bryansoffice.blogspot.com). His blog inspired me to start blogging, though he is much more committed to consistent blogging than I am. (What can I say? I am a work in progress). Bryan has a feature on his blog called "Ten Things I Think I Think". I am blatantly stealing his idea, but I am calling mine "Ten Things I Think" so as to not totally plagiarize and because I am pretty sure that I do, in fact, think these things. I've contemplated the "10 Things" idea before, but was never certain I actually thought about 10 things all at the same time--at least not 10 things anyone would want to read about...but I'm stepping out on a limb, thinking that my blogging silence has stirred up a longing in my faithful readers for any kind of entry, even one filled with ten random brain trails. Here's hoping I'm right!!!

1) My dependence on computers

My computer was broken recently, for almost a week. It was torture. I had no access to the internet, other than the occasional trip to the library or via my cell phone (where I can check email but can't send it without taking an hour to type one sentence). The amazing thing: I got a lot more accomplished. I cleaned my house (not completely, but more than I have in a while). My dogs and I took longer walks. I actually made some phone calls (those who know me well realize I am not much of a phone person...that passed with the pre-teen years). I read some of the gazillion books I own and some magazines that I subscribe to. It was a great week. But then the broken computer part came in, and I have yet again become a slave to my computer. It is amazing how much time I can waste looking things up on the internet, as if I need to know all the details about any subject I see on tv or hear in conversation. For instance, the movie "Erin Brockovich" was on TV recently and I caught the last few minutes of it. Suddenly, I needed to know more about this Erin Brockovich and what she was doing now. I watched a movie about Linda McCartney a couple of weeks ago...same thing...I needed to know more details. So off to the internet I went. I now know a lot of useless details about both women that really profit me nothing, but it was interesting.

Thinking about John Wesley, the founder of Methodism, I realize why he was such a prolific author, social activist, tireless preacher, etc. He didn't have a computer or internet or a tv. If I lived 100 years ago, I would be a lot more productive. But I guess I'm willing to trade a little productivity for electricity and indoor plumbing.

2) shaving??? what is that about?

We went to an indoor water park today with our church youth group. It was a long winter and this was my first official "summer" event...meaning it was time to shave the legs. Being in hibernation mode this winter, I'd really packed on the hair. In addition, my grandma used to tell me I looked like a "hairy Jewish man" if I went too long without shaving. She was always one to tell it like it is! Needless to say, this whole de-shedding process took a good 45-50 minutes...during which, I thought, "Whose idea was this shaving thing? Who decided that bare skin is better than furry skin? Why wasn't I born in Eastern Europe?". The internet probably has answers to some of these questions. Another thought I had was about shaving as an Olympic event. I mean, you have to be incredibly coordinated and able to stand on one leg for significant amounts of time without falling over. You have to contort your body into odd position and configurations just to reach all the hair that can be seen when wearing a bathing suit. I was so tired afterwards I wanted to take a nap, yet I felt like I had accomplished something significant...and that is why I am sharing it publically.

3) Why I will never be bishop, D.S., or in any official leadership role in the United Methodist Church...

Today, we had our District's "Spring Conference". This is a time for all the people attending annual conference--and any other interested parties--to gather together for worship, information, some business, and to get all the materials you need for annual conference. Due to our youth water park trip, I had a limited window of time this afternoon to attend the conference (let me point out that I had this water park trip planned before I knew the date for district conference). . If everything went according to plan, I could be at the conference for half an hour, at the most--and they never start on time, so I would have been there for 20 minutes of actual meeting. The only reason I was planning on attending for such a short time was to get my annual conference materials--a purely utilitarian purpose; I may not be a perfect person, but I am an honest one! With the shaving extravaganza that took place, I was running late. When all was said and done, I would have been at the conference for 15 minutes...and I would have been wearing sport pants, a t-shirt, and flip flops (which I'm sure the district superintendent would find very noteworthy). So, I decided not to go and called some of my wonderful lay people to have them pick up my coveted annual conference materials...and I just went straight to the water park, where people were already arriving half an hour before our designated meeting time. There were a lot of precipitating factors for my lateness and consequent absence from the district conference, but ultimately, I missed it because I was shaving. One of the many reasons I will never be bishop.

4) Kissing pigs...some things are more exciting in theory than in actuality

To raise money for Relay for Life, our church had a "kiss the pig" competition. Whoever had the most money donated to them would kiss a pig after church (today). This is not the first "kiss a pig" fundraiser that I have brainstormed. It is a sure sign that I grew up in the city and not the country--and a sign that I am obsessed with pigs. I asked a farmer today, after church, if he was going to stay and watch the pig kissing. He said, "I've kissed so many pigs in my life time, it's no big deal to me". An interesting sentiment.

Our Pastor Emeritus, Pastor Chuck, raised the most money...and for his efforts, he was forced to kiss a pig on the church lawn after service today. I was so excited about the pig kissing, and especially excited that, in this fundraiser, I was not the one kissing the pig (though I have done it before). There were a lot of people and I couldn't really see the "kiss" very well. The pig wasn't really into the whole thing and looked rather traumatized afterwards. I talked to the poor pig and said, "You know, in the grand scheme of your life, this is definitely not the worst thing that is going to happen to you". Poor gal...she's going to the fair in June. It's really sad, especially considering that I just watched the movie "Charlotte's Web" and apparently, there are happy endings available for pigs...at least in the movies. All in all, pig kissing seems to be more exciting in anticipation than in actuality. That's probably true of many things in life.

5) Water parks and Jesus

Being at the indoor water park all afternoon/evening, I got the chance to see a lot of little kids playing in water. The place we were at (Ft. Rapids, right here in Columbus) has this huge water container that periodically dumps tons (maybe not actual tons, but A LOT) of water--from about 50 feet up--onto the kids waiting eagerly below. When it is about to tip over, the kids (of all ages and sizes) come running. The funniest part was the screaming...childlike, excited, anticipatory screaming. As I watched the kids, I noticed that the screaming always occurred just before the water hit them, not when it actually hit them. Every time, without fail, the giggly screaming would occur just before the water hit. They were so excited. You couldn't help but smile.

One of the little boys from church, named Hamilton, was there with his mom and older siblings. I don't think he'd ever been to a place like that. His eyes were the size of pizzas as he looked at all the slides and things to do. When his mom agreed to go down one of the slides with Hamilton, he looked so giddy, it seemed he might explode. He bounced up and down with excitement...and that was his reaction to just about everything, the whole time.

All those kids, and especially Hamilton, made me think about Jesus and what he says about little children...how we are supposed to become like them in order to understand what Jesus is all about. I am sure Jesus meant a lot of things, on a lot of different levels, when He said that. But today makes me think that part of what Jesus meant has to do with excitement and expectancy...about facing life knowing that God is good and expecting that God will be good to you...free to love, laugh, dance, and play in the water...to look foolish and funny and wet and not care what anyone thinks...to jump up and down with joy and anticipation at what is coming next, around the bend...completely trusting that the One who holds the future knows what He is doing. Mostly, today made me want to laugh more and play more...and not take myself as seriously as I do sometimes...to learn how to live in lavish expectance of continuous grace.

Stay tuned for "Ten Things I Think, Part Deux"...where I will share thoughts 6-10…hopefully coming tomorrow to a blog near you!

3 Prayers

I offer 3 prayers to bless your night:

A Prayer by Mother Teresa
Dear Jesus, Help me to spread Thy fragrance everywhere I go. Flood my soul with Thy spirit and love. Penetrate and possess my whole being so utterly that all my life may only be a radiance of Thine. Shine through me and be so in me that every soul I come in contact with may feel Thy presence in my soul. Let them look up and see no longer me but only Jesus. Stay with me and then I shall begin to shine as you shine, so to shine as to be a light to others.

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Another prayer by Mother Teresa

Lord, help us to see in your crucifixion and resurrection an example of how to endure and seemingly to die in the agony and conflict of daily life, so that we may live more fully and creatively. You accepted patiently and humbly the rebuffs of human life, as well as the tortures of your crucifixion and passion. Help us to accept the pains and conflicts that come to us each day as opportunities to grow as people and become more like you. Enable us to go through them patiently and bravely, trusting that you will support us. Make us realize that it is only by frequent deaths of ourselves and our self-centered desires that we can come to live more fully; for it is only by dying with you that we can rise with you.

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A prayer by Thomas A Kempis
Give us, O Lord, steadfast hearts that cannot be dragged down by false loves; give us courageous hearts that cannot be worn down by trouble; give us righteous hearts that cannot be sidetracked by unholy or unworthy goals. Give to us also, our Lord and God, understanding to know you, diligence to look for you, wisdom to recognize you, and a faithfulness that will bring us to see you face to face.

Facing Giants

I attended the Women of Faith (www.womenoffaith.com) conference last weekend in downtown Columbus. It was a wonderfully refreshing time for me, as I seldom get to just sit back and be a recipient of great Biblical teaching. Each person that attends such a conference could probably choose one speaker who stood out the most to her…the one who spoke mostly deeply into her particular situation and soul. For me, that person was different than I expected. The speakers were announced ahead of time, as was their theme: amazing freedom. I didn’t expect Max Lucado to be the one who spoke to me most profoundly, but he was. (Though Max Lucado is not a “woman” of faith, he was—for some reason—a speaker at the all-female conference).

I have to confess, I am a bit of a Christian literature snob. I like to critique Christian books, because many of them seem so superficial to me. What they say is not bad, it just doesn’t go deep enough for my taste. (In reality, I’m probably not as deep as I imagine myself to be!) My need to look disdainfully down my nose at some of the Christian sub-culture’s writings is changing, especially after last weekend. You see, Max Lucado has not escaped my critiques in the past.

I have read many of Lucado’s books and, while they have a nice devotional feel, they don’t plunge the depths like C.S. Lewis, A.W. Tozer, and Francis Schaeffer (just to name a few of the great authors who brilliantly unravel and proclaim the mysteries of the Christian life and experience). I will publicly admit, however, that I once received a “Max Lucado Award” from the Women’s Chorale, during my freshman year at Wheaton College. This was precipitated by my frequent use of Max’s books as material for devotions before choir practice. Like I said earlier, I’ve always admired his work for its devotional appeal, but that is where my admiration stopped…until last weekend.

Max was the keynote speaker on Friday night of the conference. I was instantly struck by his warmth and authenticity. If I had to give the same talk/sermon over and over again, all across the country, I wouldn’t have appeared so gracious and kind! You can’t fake caring. Somehow, Max seemed genuinely concerned for the souls of each of the 20,000 women present that night. He smiled a lot, but didn’t come across as cheesy. I have seen so many smiley, plastic-like mass communicators who want to seem authentic, but the harder they try, the more of a caricature they become. That was not the case with Max. He meant what he said. I liked that about him. As he spoke, I thought, “That’s the kind of guy I would want as my pastor”. Somehow, all of his fame has not gone to his head; he has remained a faithful servant of Jesus. There are some Christian speakers I hear and think, “They say pretty words, but I wouldn’t want to share my darkest wounds and fears with them; in fact, I’d be scared to talk to them”. With Max Lucado, I felt he was someone I could go to coffee with and it would be like talking with an average, every-day, normal person who passionately loves Jesus. I liked that about him.

Max spoke about the “giants” in our lives. He has a book out called “Facing Your Giants”. The talk probably came from there. I like his stuff better as a sermon. You can tell God made Max to be a pastor. His pastor’s heart shined through the whole time. Maybe that’s why he was instantly trustable in my eyes…why his words got past the barriers I often place around my heart.

You see, I’ve been going through a season of giants, myself. Max’s words spoke straight into my situation. Now I get why people often say to me on a Sunday: “Did you give that sermon just for me?” There are some messages that seem tailor-made for our unique situations. So it was with the idea of giants.

Max talked about David and his battle with Goliath, the giant. David, apparently, picked up 5 stones from a stream as part of his arsenal against the giant (a detail mentioned in Scripture that I somehow passed over). I think Max made 5 points, one for each of the stones (very clever, I thought), but that is not what spoke to me. The idea of having 5 stones stuck with me. At some point, Max read Scripture concerning Goliath’s siblings. The Bible lists at least 4 brothers that Goliath had, but there may have been more (and what if Goliath was the runt of the family?). Max said David had no way of knowing it would end with Goliath. For all David knew, the minute he slew Goliath, 4 more giants could have come up over the mountain, looking to avenge their slain brother. David would have had the ammunition to face them, with his 5 stones. It made me think of all the times in life when you are facing something that feels insurmountable, and then even more overwhelming things happen on top of it. Somehow, just naming that reality helped me (the reality that we might have more than one giant in our lives; or the reality that, the minute we conquer one problem, several more may rise up in place of the slain one). It is nice to be reminded that other people have faced giants…and that they have won the battle! But more importantly, Max kept reiterating the idea of letting God fight your battles and standing firm in the Lord—that we can only slay the giants through God’s power, never through our own. I often try to do it all in my own strength—and always get pummeled by the giants. That reminds me of the title of a book by Ellsworth Kalas: “If Experience is Such a Good Teacher, Why Do I Keep Repeating the Course?”. You’d think I’d know better by now that I can “do all things through Christ who strengthens me”, not through my own efforts. But I forget!

So, blogging friends, in my giant-fighting absence from my blog in recent weeks, I pray that you have experienced more and more of God’s presence. May you find Him more than capable of handling anything that comes your way, even the giants that seem so big. They ARE big, but not from God’s vantage point. He has a different definition of what “big” is. I pray for me, and for you, for new eyes, to see God’s perspective on the situations of our lives. May we stand firm in God’s strength and find that He never fails us.

Trying to Earn God's Approval?

I've received some comments on my lack of blogging, so I am here to offer my apologies and provide a new blog entry. For me, it is one of those seasons of life that I will just label as "blah". Certain situations and obstacles are weighing heavily upon me, leaving me somewhat voiceless. Not really knowing what to write about, I do want to post something. I promise something more creative and heartfelt soon. But for now, I offer an article I found interesting and thought-provoking.

TOO RICH TO ACCEPT GOD'S CHARITY
by Clint Heacock
taken from: http://www.theooze.com/articles/article.cfm?id=1511

I wonder if this is true. For me, I guess I’ve always felt that I brought something to the table in my relationship with God. After all, there are some things I can do pretty well—like Napoleon Dynamite, I’ve got some skills to offer…

Thinking about it, the relationships I have are based on some type of reciprocation. After all, who wants to be involved in a relationship with a person who always takes and takes and takes? We call those people “needy” and either avoid them entirely, or if somehow we do get trapped in a relationship with a needy person, we roll our eyes when their number comes up on the caller ID because we know they’ll babble for hours about all of their problems. And the worst thing about people like that is, no matter how much or what advice we give them—and they even ask for, and agree with it!—they don’t follow it. How annoying is that.

Those kinds of relationships are draining. I think that for most people, their hope is to enter into some kind of healthy relationship with other people, a relationship that is mutually beneficial and mutually expanding. As I’ve said, the kind of relationships that are somehow emotionally or physically deficient we term “dysfunctional,” and they generally are seen as unhealthy. Hopefully we can successfully avoid these.

As we progress through life, it seems to me that people develop a kind of “relationship meter” that helps them gauge how they’re doing in relationships. Some people seem to have a lot of good relationships, whereas others can’t seem to make or keep friends. If we find ourselves as one of those kinds of people that others seek out, we feel like we have something positive to offer others. On the other hand, if we’re one of the people who are somehow ill equipped socially, we may feel that we have little or nothing to offer.

But one thing I’m learning is that somehow when it comes to a relationship with God, his “relationship meter” doesn’t work the same way my human scale does. He doesn’t seem to care too much about what I have to offer, whether it’s a little or a whole lot. In fact I know that he doesn’t care at all about our outward appearance, but rather looks on the inside. The Bible makes that abundantly clear. Of course, we place a premium of value on appearance—but God doesn’t care about that at all.

I have been coming to the conclusion that I’m too rich to accept God’s charity. I’m not talking about money, I’m talking about the reality that what I bring to his table doesn’t count for much in terms of value. What about spiritual disciplines? I always figured that if I read my Bible and pray on a regular basis, I was racking up Brownie points with God—I was earning my way, bringing something to the relationship. “See, God, I am worth something! I can earn my keep in this thing! You don’t have to worry about me!” And if I kept up, I would feel good inside, having checked off the boxes for the day.

See, if I’m earning my way, I don’t really need him a whole lot: only when I encounter situations that are clearly out of my control. When that happens, deep down inside I hope he’ll come through for me; but if he doesn’t, I’ve got a backup plan or two in mind anyway. Actually if I’m honest, the backup plan was really Plan A, and God was Plan C or D. I figured that if he came through that’d be great, and that would save me the hassle of having to work it out myself. And, if he doesn’t come through for me, well, it’s just like a buddy who blows you off on the day you were moving. Sure, it makes things harder, but what the heck—so it takes a little longer and is harder. Oh well, who ever said life was supposed to be fair?

Looked at this way, God and I are buddies on some kind of semi-equal footing. For the most part, I try to keep my nose clean, stay out of trouble, so I don’t actually have to ask his forgiveness if I blow it. That would put me in a position of having to take from him yet again. On the plus side, by doing my spiritual disciplines regularly, I put a bunch of check marks in his plus category. So I’m in good shape there.

Lately, after coming to my conclusion, I’ve been saying this out loud to God before I pick up my Bible to read or study it: “God, I just want you to know that I am about to read my Bible. I’m not doing it to earn points. I know that you don’t love me any more if I read it, or any less if I don’t. I hope that I’m doing it because I actually want to learn about you, and this seems the best way to do it. OK? Are we good then?”

I’m not sure if it’s for him or me.

I think there’s some kind of connection with God’s grace in here somewhere. I just don’t want to be too rich to accept his charity.

Why such pain in the world?

Tragedy occurred at Virginia Tech today, where 33 people died as the result of a mass shooting. If you have not yet heard about this, go to cnn.com or any news site; it is the front page story, everywhere. Certainly, we must be in vigilant prayer for the families who have lost loved ones, for those injured physically and psychologically, and for the entire shocked and hurting campus and community. For me, and others, this event begs the inevitable question: “Why?”

Whenever tragedy happens, that question surfaces in one form or another. Usually it is: “Why did God let this happen?” There are myriad books written on this topic and I doubt I have anything new to add to the mix. In a nutshell: what happened today was the result of human choice, human sinfulness. That shooter made a choice--a horrible, awful, tragic choice--with life-altering effects for people who were just going about their ordinary days. God let’s us make choices. I believe it is a necessary part of being free people who were created with the ability to love God or to walk away. God didn’t want robots: He wants people who fully and freely choose to love Him. Who am I to question God, but I wonder if the “robot” thing wouldn’t have been a better deal. We really mess up this freedom thing. Is our un-fettered love really worth all this…worth 33 people needlessly dying? It makes me think of a short poem by Robert Frost, entitled “A Question”:

A voice said, Look me in the stars
And tell me, truly, men of earth,
If all the soul-and-body scars
Were not too much to pay for birth.

There are a lot of questions I cannot fully answer. The only thing I know with any certainty is that God has proven His love and nearness to us, in the midst of suffering. The Cross shows us God's loving nature more than anything else, reminding us: that we are not alone, that God understands, that God cares, that we will never be abandoned.

I remember working as a chaplain at a Catholic hospital. In the “chapel” (which was the size of a cathedral), there was a huge cross mounted at the front of the sanctuary, complete with a life-sized form of Jesus hanging on it. In the middle of the night—when I was “on call”—I found myself in the darkened chapel. An 18 year old man had just died from injuries sustained in a car crash. I had stood prayerfully with the boy’s parents during the holy moment when he passed from life to death. I wept with them and prayed with them—and after it was all over, I was drained and confused. I didn’t understand why an all-powerful, all-loving God failed to step in, failed to heal, failed to be what I thought God should be in that time and place. In my grief, I went to the only place I could think to go: to the chapel, to seek God's presence. As I cried and wrestled in prayer, my eyes were drawn upward to that form, hanging on the cross. I looked at the feet and hands, pierced by shockingly huge nails. I stared at the head, bowed in agonizing sorrow, imagining my God bleeding and hurting, for the world...for me. God spoke to my soul in that sacred quietness. He didn’t answer my questions, at least not in the way I expected. Suddenly, though, I knew that God was there, RIGHT THERE in the midst of the pain and suffering. God understands. God "gets" it; He's been here; He has felt raw, agonizing, seemingly endless suffering. God is real…in a right-here-right-now kind of way…closer than our very breath, closer even, than our deepest pain. The Cross proves God's suffering, sacrificing closeness to His creatures...to you and me.

I couldn’t believe in God if it weren’t for Jesus. I guess I just need to know that God is real and interacting in my life and in the world. Some far off God does not work for me. But the kind of God who walks our streets, takes on our limitations, and enters into our sufferings…that’s the kind of God I want to know. Good news! The Scriptures say that Jesus is the fullness of God, a tangible picture of who God is and what God is like:

“He (Christ) is the image of the invisible God, the firstborn over all creation. For by him all things were created: things in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or powers or rulers or authorities; all things were created by him and for him. He is before all things, and in him all things hold together. And he is the head of the body, the church; he is the beginning and the firstborn from among the dead, so that in everything he might have the supremacy. For God was pleased to have all his fullness dwell in him, and through him to reconcile to himself all things, whether things on earth or things in heaven, by making peace through his blood, shed on the cross. ~Colossians 1:15-20

That is my comfort in the midst of tragedy and suffering: We have a good God that is with us, even in the darkest hours—maybe even more profoundly present in the darkest times. I pray for the overwhelming sense of Jesus’ Presence to be with those at Virginia Tech. I invite you to join me in that prayer.

In closing, I searched the internet for quotes on pain and suffering. I thought I would share insight and wisdom of people much wiser than I am. May you be blessed by their thoughts.

Quotes on Pain and Suffering:
In this world you will have tribulation, but be of good cheer, for I have overcome the world. ~Jesus Christ

God whispers to us in our pleasures, speaks in our conscience, but shouts in our pains: it is His megaphone to rouse a deaf world. ~C.S. Lewis

We all know people who have been made much meaner and more irritable and more intolerable to live with by suffering: it is not right to say that all suffering perfects. It only perfects one type of person…the one who accepts the call of God in Christ Jesus. ~Oswald Chambers

Far too often, however, we resent and resist any interference on God's part that might deprive us of our deepest desires. Many Christians who sing, 'It is well with my soul,' are lying. It is not well with their souls because they are not persevering, and they have no intention of doing so, because they are bitter and hostile toward God and mourn over their 'victimization' at His hands. Others are little better, for they 'persevere' with a cold, stony, stoic demeanor that constantly reminds God how much they are doing for Him despite His lack of reciprocity. ~Jim Owen

The world is full of suffering, it is also full of overcoming it. ~Helen Keller

You may never know that JESUS is all you need, until JESUS is all you have. ~Corrie Ten Boom

My barn having burned to the ground, I can now see the moon. ~Japanese poet Masahide

Pain is never permanent. ~Teresa of Avila

God is often (in some sense) nearer to us, and more effectually present with us, in sickness than in health...He often sends diseases of the body to cure those of the soul. Comfort yourself with the sovereign Physician of both the soul and the body. ~Brother Lawrence

In the depth of winter, I finally learned that there was within me an invincible summer. ~Camus

I have learned two lessons in my life: first, there are no sufficient literary, psychological, or historical answers to human tragedy, only moral ones. Second, just as despair can come to one another only from other human beings, hope, too, can be given to one only by other human beings. ~Elie Wiesel

Deep unspeakable suffering may well be called a baptism, a regeneration, the initiation into a new state. ~George Elliot

You desire to know the art of living, my friend? It is contained in one phrase: make use of suffering. ~Henri-Frédéric Amiel

In light of heaven, the worst suffering on earth, a life full of the most atrocious tortures on earth, will be seen to be no more serious than one night in an inconvenient hotel. ~Mother Teresa

Suffering becomes beautiful when anyone bears great calamities with cheerfulness, not through insensibility but through greatness of mind. ~Aristotle

If there is a meaning in life at all, then there must be a meaning in suffering. Suffering is an ineradicable part of life, even as fate and death. Without suffering and death, human life cannot be complete. ~Viktor Emil Frankl,

The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of the depths. These persons have an appreciation, a sensitivity and an understanding of life that fills them with compassion, gentleness, and a deep loving concern. Beautiful people do not just happen. ~Elisabeth Kubler Ross

Most things break, including hearts. The lessons of life amount not to wisdom, but to scar tissue and callus. ~Wallace Stegner

Suffering is part of the human condition, and it comes to us all. The key is how we react to it, either turning away from God in anger and bitterness or growing closer to Him in trust and confidence. ~Billy Graham