Joy Robbers

I served as a spiritual director on a Christian retreat (called "Emmaus") this past weekend. During a question and answer time, one of the questions asked was: "What do you do with all the 'joy robbers' at your church"? First, I laughed...because I knew exactly what that woman meant by a "joy robber". They are everywhere, in the church and outside the church: people who sap your energy, squash your dreams, poop on your best ideas, and generally make you want to go jump off a bridge. I gave some really poetic pastoral response about keeping our focus on Jesus and not letting other people's responses bring us down. I talked about Jesus being crucified on the cross and how his response to people far worse than a joy robber was, "Father, forgive them. They don't know what they are doing". I even mentioned how, if we are honest with ourselves, each one of us has been a joy robber to someone else, probably without even knowing it. People nodded their heads in agreement with my extremely profound and spiritually insightful answer to the question. I was pretty proud of myself. Then I left the weekend to attend my church that morning, before heading back to Emmaus to finish the rest of the weekend.

Just before worship service started, I saw one coming toward me...one of my favorite joy robbers. This person has made joy robbing into an art form. In our brief interaction, I felt all the peace, rest, beauty, energy, and grace I had been experiencing on the Emmaus weekend completely drain from my soul. I sat down in my fancy pastor's chair while our wonderful church pianist played music for the acolytes. I had my head down, praying...frustrated and disappointed. My husband caught my eye and mouthed to me, "What's wrong?". I mouthed back the name of that morning's joy robber. He instantly laughed, because he has heard many tales of joy robbing involving that particular name--and even experienced it himself. I was so angry with myself, upset that I could let someone steal my joy that quickly and easily. The irony was not lost on me. It is one thing to tell people how to act Christlike in response to joy robbers. It is quite another thing to live it out.

I had time while driving back to the Emmaus weekend after church services to pray and reflect about how easily I lose sight of Christ and all His goodness. I eventually caught sight of Him again, but we will see what happens the next time a joy robber comes around (my guess is that will be Sunday morning some time)...I am sure my eyes will slip again, and I will be discouraged, at least momentarily.

There are some who say not to worry about the joy robbers, but I do. Part of it is my neurotic need to have everyone like me. But a deeper part is that I truly care about people, even the cranky ones. My favorite joy robber--the one who got me this past Sunday--is someone I genuinely like. I want that person to know the joy that Jesus brings. I don't think you can be a joy robber if you are experiencing the life and Spirit of Christ at work in your heart on a regular basis. My guess is that those joy robbers are missing some joy themselves...why else would they need to rob it from those who have it?

There are church leaders who have said to me, "The secret to leadership is to go with those who want to go". The premise there is to focus on the people who are excited to go where you are leading, and let the others gripe and grumble as they may. There is truth in that. The joy robbers can steal your attention from what is important. But they still matter to God, grumpy and draining though they may be.

I have this unquenchable optimism in the power of Jesus Christ to transform hearts and lives. I have experienced it myself...and experience on a regular basis. I see His power at work in lives all around me. I want to see it at work in those joy robbers.

My new goal in dealing with joy robbers is two-fold: 1) even though their responses may bother me momentarily, I will not dwell on it and 2) I will do everything in my power to show joy to the joy robbers...so that they can stop robbing and start overflowing.

My challenge for you today (and for me) is to hunt down some joy robbers--seek them out--and lavish your joy on them. Then walk away smiling.